Most people would describe it as the ability to get on with someone, share understanding or be on the same wavelength. It is vitally important to establish this rapport, for without it your relationship with your apprentice is likely to run into problems.
From time to time, we all meet people with whom we have no rapport. Why is that? What is missing? Often, this happens because one person feels the other is either ‘stand-offish’ or over-familiar. Sometimes it might be to do with the person’s tone of voice. More often than not, whether we are getting along with the other person or not, we notice it intuitively.
How to build the right rapport with your mentee
Think back to when you last felt very comfortable with another person. Perhaps you were meeting for the first time but something just ‘clicked’. Was this a gut feeling? Intuition?
One sign that there is comfort or rapport between two people is that they have a similar tone of voice, body language, movements and so on. Rapport also comes from shared values or experiences, and sometimes from a ‘chemistry’ that is hard to define. We tend to like and trust people who are similar to us. This reaction happens in our unconscious and that’s why we put it down to gut feeling or intuition.
Building rapport
Consider how you will build rapport with your mentee.
When in the company of others, have a (discreet) look around at other people talking together. Look for examples of similarities or ‘synchronicity’ between them, using these questions to guide you:
- Are their body postures similar?
- Do they use similar hand movements?
- Look at their faces, especially their expressions. What do they tell you?
- Are their moods similar?
- How similar are their voices?
There are other elements that could be added to the list but the important thing is that you are able to see for yourself how this happens.